Dear Simon:
Just a quick note. I am planning to attend the Geneva show. As usual I will be staying at the Hotel De Bergues (below). Daily rates are a reasonable £438 per night but the quality is superb and it´s very close to the Davidoff store so I can pick up that box of cigars you wanted. The other guys can stay at the Pension Silva (above). It´s a bit of a trip out of town but a much more cost-effective £83 per night, sharing. You can tell them the Silva is booked up so I can´t stay there with the team. Or better still, don´t mention it unless someone brings up the topic.
If all goes well I´ll be inviting Piech and Marchionne to an evening dinner to take them through the main features of the blog. Can you get someone to re-write that item about Marchionne so it´s less abrasive? I´ll need some A/V help so get one of the secretaries (Helen?) to bring the OHP and the Mac. I can´t fit this into my carry-on bag and I don´t want any stowed luggage as it delays my departure from the airport to collect it. Anyway, just to warn you, I won´t be leaping in to order the house red for Piech or Marchionne so the expenses may be a bit higher than normal.
Are there any new models you want me to look at? I have about two hours on the second day to scout about before I head off for the wine tasting.
Finally, I´ll need to get approval for the hire car I used for my last item. They only had an S-class at Eurodrive.
Best!
Richard
Richard
First of all, please can you not put these sensitive matters on the front page? I have asked my nephew to remove them, but he has had no luck and they are still there for all to see.
I fear that my mention of an internship with Archie Vicar has labelled me a Bon Viveur in your eyes. Nothing could be further from the truth, although I enjoy a Prawn Cocktail and Chicken Chasseur washed down with a glass of Blue Nun as well as the next man.
I have already exhausted the DTW Slush Fund for 2014 sorting out that business for you at the Gritti Palace. By the way, can you elaborate exactly which new car was being launched (apposite verb) in Venice?
As for Piech, I always felt that a man who considers five an appropriate number of cylinders for an engine must be slightly unhinged. Be careful with the company you keep.
I’m sorry to disappoint you with this news, but do rest assured that bus tickets will continue to be refunded, as long as you retain them and submit by the third Friday in the month.
Parsimoniously Yours
Simon A Kearne
Driven To Write 
And now for something completely different:
Is there a chance we could raise DTW’s visual/artistic profile through hiring automotive photographer extraordinaire, nick129 (if that’s still his nom de plume), the genius behind, among others, the era-defining “Vauxhall Corsa GSI” series? I’m aware of the budget restrictions, but we could do with some of the PR benefits associated with such a household name.
I did a fortnight’s stint as editor of Cars and Car Conversions a while back (come to think of it about 25 years) whilst the permanent chap was on holiday. I recollect there were some nifty snappers along those lines sending stuff in all the time. I might still have got some of their Enprints in a cardboard box somewhere. I recollect a fine one of a Mark 1 Fiesta with bubble wheel arches which had been converted to Targa specification by cutting off part of the roof, then finished in a purple sort of hue. Is that the sort of thing you had in mind? I think the box might be in my attic somewhere, though I fear that The Lads are rather conservative when it comes to those sort of things.
I´ve been told that the price for the Hotel Pension Silva does include a continental breakfast as standard: a cup of coffee and a Gauloise. In the spirit of egalité, I hope you can find a way to allow for an additional 12CHF per person per day for those staying at the Silva. In my case, it´s all inclusive.
Best,
R
Richard. I’m afraid that your dogged insistence regarding accommodation is bringing back bad memories of the time I had to sleep in the back of a Hillman Super Minx whilst Archie Vicar lived it up at the Georges V in Paris. I had no sleeping bag, just Archie’s sheepskin car coat which was scarcely salubrious. I should point out that, if you proceed with this course, the rest of the Editorial staff are likely to be staying in a camp site. This is hardly going to foster the democratic spirit The Lads had in mind.
Dear Simon: I really enjoy your British irony! As you know the permissions setting on this mean the rest of the team are not able to view this correspondence. I have to say that from what I heard about the George V hotel, you were the lucky one. I doubt Archie Vicar got much sleep in that hotel, if you catch my drift. What I mean is of course that the bolster pillows are dreadfully uncomfortable and the plumbing was famously the noisiest in Paris. About democratic spirit, I need not point out that the majority of the team will be staying in the same hotel. That´s democratic, is it not? Thanks for your understanding on the matter. Did you want a box of 20 or 40 half coronas? I will be speaking to Gunther at Davidoff on Friday.