Which is more than you can say about Bristol…
Okay Saab, we know this is a difficult time for you right now, especially with you being dead and everything. Obviously we’re sorry for your trouble, but if we can be completely candid, this whole thing is starting to get a little unnerving.
How many funerals is it now? Last time I counted, I made it three. Look, I know you’re finding the whole afterlife business a little on the dull side, especially given the excitements on offer in Trollhättan, but you’re really going to have to stop this whole coming back to life only to die again malarkey. It’s getting rather tiresome, to say nothing of the fact that it’s costing us a fortune in flowers. The simple truth is it’s really quite hard to miss you when you refuse to go away. So be a good boy, get into your coffin and stay there.
Yes, we know you don’t want to and we know NEVS might win the lottery or something, but face it – you’re dead. Look at Bristol over there – he’s accepted his fate with grace and fortitude. Why can’t you be more like him? What’s that? Bristol’s back from the dead now. Oh for heaven’s sake!
Driven To Write 