Driven to Write attempts to foster an addition to the motorist’s lexicon.
Someone reading this somewhere might have been given a Christmas present of a book that gives names to things that don’t have names. Like the dust that collects inside PCs which is, maybe, microfluff. I don’t know if such a book exists, but books such as that, given as gifts, often end up in toilets. There is probably even a name for those sorts of books; maybe lavastories. Or maybe not, because they aren’t fiction. At least, I don’t think so although, in truth, I find myself unable to read them. I long ago shook off the worst of my childhood OCD, but I do find the idea of handling paper that has been handled by other people who are crapping as unacceptable.
As such, I’m unsure whether this particular niche might already have been filled or not, but I wish to agree a name for those spurious bits of trim that appear on car bodies that have no practical function. By this I don’t mean a generous line of chrome trim, which has an aesthetic purpose even if, like. me you might dispute it. I mean those ill-formed shapes that seem to be there to help make sense of an ill-resolved design but that you (by which I mean I) can’t help but see as ill-resolved entities in themselves.
I have given these the holding name of Fingles. I’m not sure why, and I’m happy to consider an alternative and wittier title. They irritate me because they seem to assume that I don’t notice that they are quick fixes to sort out problems encountered in adapting the lavish initial sketches with the dour reality of productionising. Yet they’re not cheap. Each of them will have been carefully drawn out, maybe with several options, possibly rapid prototyped, then put into production and, finally, fitted. This will have cost a fair bit.
As well as an alternative title, I’m also happy to consider nominations for the Most Fatuous Fingle. As a starting point I will nominate the three above.