Jukebox Jury

There’s a new Juke in town. 

I’m not going to mince words here. I didn’t much care for the outgoing Nissan Juke. I say outgoing only insofar as I was vaguely aware that a replacement was imminent, but its introduction some time last Autumn rather passed me by. I find this realisation somewhat disquieting, given the amount of time I expend or otherwise squander appraising myself of the ifs, buts and maybes associated with the European automotive industry.

But anyway, it seems the Juke has been replaced – a realisation that gradually dawned earlier this week while innocently attempting to regain some bipedal mobility. (Or to put it in layman’s terms, while out for a walk). Always with at least one eye for an article, I was moved to photograph the Juke’s latest incarnation, albeit insufficiently so to actually cross the road and carry out the process in depth.

In my defence, neither the ambient conditions – the Carrigrohane skies being at least as leaden as the Nissan’s paintwork – nor the traffic conditions on a particularly busy and fast moving stretch of road (one which it might interest you to learn once upon a time hosted a Grand Prix) were in my favour.

Grown-up will likely be the adjective of choice employed by the gentlemen of the press to describe the 2020 Juke. Twinned, one assumes with the latest generation of Renault Captur, which I might suggest appears even more grown-up still, the Nissan has shed the original’s love-or-loathe styling for something considerably less binary, albeit with a very light sprinkling of Juke-ness, so as to remind customers of their individuality and freedom of choice.

Viewed as a box-ticking exercise it’s about spot-on. However alongside its B-segment counterpart from Toyota City, it’s downright apologetic. Mind you given that your average suburban Rochestown retiree’s C-HR makes Lamborghini’s Urus look a smidge tentative, that’s hardly a stinging criticism.

Which isn’t to say that Nissan doesn’t understand the market it helped create. And while Toyota has illustrated just how far the customer is prepared to travel (if the nameplate is right), its embattled Franco-Japanese rival seems likely to do at least as well across Europe with this offering.

Faint praise. All of which makes me perhaps less qualified to critique the Juke without prejudice, something which cannot be levelled at fellow scribe, Richard Herriott, whose broadly impartial impressions of a first-generation Juke are perhaps as relevant now as they were in 2014.

Author: Eóin Doyle

Founder. Editor. Content Provider.

8 thoughts on “Jukebox Jury”

  1. Eóin, your grey existential photos and muted response to this new thing
    are entirely appropriate. the Juke has progressed from being tolerable
    to being execrable, like Toyota’s C-HR.
    more interesting is your mention of Carrigrohane and a Grand Prix!
    wikipedia provides this nonsense about the 2.75 mile Carrigrohane Straight:
    “During the 1920s and 1930s, both motorbikes, such as the Yamaha 750 cc, and cars, such as the Ingersoll-Rand Formula One Shadow, featured in speed trials and racing competitions. Drivers in these competitions came from across Europe, and crowds came from all over Cork and Munster to see the trials. In more recent years the Straight has been used for only speed trials, including land speed records for motorbikes and cars.”

  2. Good morning, Eóin. As someone who has definitely become more conservative (small “c”) as I get older, I can’t help wondering what Rochestown’s pensioners are putting in their tea. Sure, the C-HR has a slightly higher H-point, but just look at it!

    Readers of a nervous disposition should look away now:

    Regarding the Juke, the first generation model, apart from its other foibles, had the most awkwardly placed model and trim badges, pushed far outboard to the corners of the bumper and appearing not to be horizontal, which made sitting behind one in traffic a jarring experience for me:

    Yes, I know, I really should find more important things to worry about.

  3. You´ll find me in the booster camp for both cars. Having dieted on austere good taste since first worshipping at the altars of the E28 and the Saab 900 of the same vintage, I find both the C-HR and first Juke harmless good fun. I love the jolly, carefree and unselfconscious chirpiness of the Juke and don´t care that it´s not too well finished or all that well resolved. The C-HR is trying to something radical with sculpting and highlights in that it´s the anti-highlight car. I think the did not care if the reflections were odd – that wanted strong shadows and relief. If you don´t like it, they´ll be gone in 10 years. Or you can look away. I like the bravery of these cars.

  4. I’m with Daniel on this one. The C-HR is a mobile mantelpiece. That rear end could support a clock or a nice picture, it’s not for a motor car. Can you see out of the back at all, with or without the picture/clock?

    And my comments on the Juke are known. At least the first version stood out, if, to me for all the wrong reasons. This new frog looks like all the rest, just different in size. The interior has spaceships controls which lend it a likeness of a naff toy trying too hard.
    1 out of ten: for trying but could do oh-so better

  5. I’ve complained about this before, but am happy to do so again: the rear cabin of the C-HR is an oppressive, gloomy and thoroughly unpleasant place to spend any time. Simply horrid. So think of this car as a two seater with occasional seats in the second row – what is the point?

    The new Juke is thoroughly boring, like a car designed by focus group. Yuk.

    1. Jacomo: The C-HR is a latter-day personal coupé. The rear compartment is therefore not only irrelevant but most likely unutilised by most owners for the transportation of human cargo. One thing I’ll say in its defence is that it has the courage of its convictions. It’s wilfully outré. I’m not sure that it would have been Ireland’s 10th best selling car last year if it didn’t hail from Toyota City, but it’s nevertheless an impressive achievement for something so otherworldly in so conservative a market. But while the C-HR was conclusively ‘designed’, the Juke on the other hand has always looked somewhat contrived. The new one manages to look both contrived and conformist – as though Nissan’s designers simply gave up. Or more likely, were handed an over-restrictive brief.

    2. Eoin, I take your point, but cars used as ‘personal coupes’ are unlikely to get into the best seller charts in Ireland and UK. I pity the poor children condemned to travel in the back of these cars – they will no doubt be glued to their screens and personal devices because there is little prospect of them being able to see out of the car.

    3. The new Juke is such a tick box exercise it makes me angry.

      Expressive front graphic: check.
      Massive wheels: check:
      Angular body side graphic: check.
      Tiny glasshouse: check.
      Worst of all – bi-colour character line that rises and falls over rear wheel arch (just like C-HR and a hundred others): check.

      Truly pathetic.

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