Have A Cigar

One for the road, or should we say, gravy train?

DTW has quite the history concerning car ashtrays; an entire section devoted to nothing but covered in great detail by Richard Herriott. Fascinating regarding detail and engineering, smoking and driving were once considered under a more roseate light. Concurrently, the modern day car’s lighter socket can sometimes be found empowering the tobacco smokers alternative, the vaping machine. However, for the (extremely) well heeled, Rolls-Royce can offer a real world experience, if not, perhaps within the confines of the plush cabin then a geste, al fresco.

Recently released to those whose world revolves around the Spirit of Ecstasy, one can have fitted in one’s boot space[1] the Cellarette – a bespoke whisky and cigar chest. Historically, the Cellarette was used to store bottles of your master’s favourite tipple in something other than a wicker basket within the confines of the motor carriage. Whether stopping to admire the view or entertaining your Glyndebourne guests, a measure would always be to hand.

Taking the idea further, your local Rolls-Royce dealer can relieve you of £40,570 (excluding local taxes) for the privilege of using the Cellarette to its full potential. Yes, for the cash price of a brand new BMW 520 SE (or for the plug in generation, a Polestar) one can enjoy not only the mouthfeel of whisky but the aromas from Cuba’s finest.

The Cellarette

Bespoke Designer, Nicholas Abrams maintains the Cellarette will “both surprise and delight anyone encountering it.” And who are we to argue? Placed upon a polished aluminium chassis, itself enveloped in embossed Havana leather, lies more than any mere tray. Inlaid with the Spirit is the Obsidian Ayous open pore veneered deck. Once open, akin to a cigarette smoked within a cave, the ambient inner glow invites all to take a peek. Armagnac leathers, rivalling the mystique of a private members club, harbour the enigmatic delights with “a charming sense of theatre.” Quite.

Hand-blown lo-ball glasses, replete with the RR monogram rotate towards the thirsty plutocrat where upon the leather clad pannier holding said poison reveals itself: aperitif? Digestif? WTF? The wacky may install Lucozade but whatever the drink in question, the RR embellished holder can accommodate all sizings of bottles. Magically (or magnetically, in reality) held in suspension by a polished aluminium clasp, a resolute push is necessary to free the liquor. Heavens, genuine effort!

Once poured and savoured, may we offer you a cigar? Snugly opposite lays the humidor which is fashioned from Spanish cedar wood and controlled by a hygrometer, itself an homage to the eternal Rolls-Royce clock. This highly polished aluminium cylinder resembles a Gatling gun cartridge; the long term effects may prove almost as lethal.

More magnets hold the other essentials to enjoy the luxuriant trappings of fags and booze in a field; a lighter and cigar cutter. Hailing from S.T. Dupont, Paris, both are exquisite additions to this already overt Goodwood factory offering. Yet more Ecstasy expressions are engraved here but we’re finally around the point of focus.

Or perhaps the lack of it. The ashtray, magnetically held in place until the Cellarette is opened is shaped like that of a knock off wheel hub. Designed to rest the cigar upon whilst admiring the alcohol, would one really allow ash into one’s plush boot? If smoking outside, surely the ashtray is most commonly the floor? The grass, pavement or Goodwood paddock would suffice but I suppose you could get the butler to place this heavyweight on a suitable table. And then empty it once full.

Remarkable the engineering and class undoubtedly are, the Cellarette appears an archaic device for stripping yet more money from those with seemingly unending supplies of the stuff. A collectible item, a trinket. Dazzling in operation but on the whole – gone in a puff of smoke.

[1] The Cellarette will fit any modern Rolls-Royce. Don’t hold back now.

As a non smoker (tried once aged eleven behind the school bike shed with less than flattering results), I’m not against those who wish to smoke. There are times I like nothing better than inhaling small amounts of the sweet aroma of a cigar or cigarette but one does prefer the older and less common pipe smoke, vanilla blending with goodness knows what kind of twist. Infinitely more agreeable than the chemically created vape cloud we have today.

Data Source/ images: press.Rolls-Roycemotorcars.com

Author: Andrew Miles

Beyond hope there lie dreams; after those, custard creams?

7 thoughts on “Have A Cigar”

  1. Good morning, Andrew. Wow, smoking and drinking are expansive hobbies at this level, I had better cancel that order on the 520i SE 😉

  2. The occasional aroma of a good Havana or, better still, Gauloise Disque Bleu hanging in the air is sadly missed by this non-smoker; less so the thick fug of second hand Craven A & Woodbines. But oh dear, that Cellarette was designed by a complete Phillistine: one should never serve whisky (not even whiskey) in a straight-sided glass!!

    1. Smoking cigars and drinking at the same time is a waste of both products. One should concentrate on one at a time: a cigar if you´re alone or a whiskey if you are in company.

  3. Good morning Andrew and a Happy Boxing Day to you!

    Like you, I am a lifetime non-smoker and, while respecting others’ right to do so, I can’t help wondering how destructive to the second-hand value of a Rolls-Royce (or any car) prior ownership by a heavy smoker would be. When I was a newly minted driver and confined to buying second-hand cars, I would immediately dismiss any owned by a smoker as it was never possible to expunge the smell. Perhaps they have chemicals to do so more effectively these days?

    It’s amazing the culture around smoking has changed since I was a child. Do modern cars even come with ashtrays anymore? Neither of ours has one and the 12V socket that would formerly have held a cigarette lighter is now described as an accessories socket and is only used for trickle-charging the battery on the Boxster. (The Mini prohibits such use for some reason.)

    1. Same here, Daniel. I don’t smoke and I stopped drinking too. In my early days of working life people would still smoke in the office. I am still grateful smoking is largely banned these days. Sorry smokers, just my two cents.

    2. Freerk: I agree, smoking at work and indoors is nasty for everyone. I can say it was just great for smokers. I liked sitting on the smoking carriage on the London-Coventry line on Friday, with a cigar and a book.

  4. Good day Andrew. Late to the party but for good reason – rollerblading with our Granddaughter! I’ll have the 520i thank you…

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