Theme Of Themes : Evolution – When Genes Mutate

We go back to a time before fun was a 24/7 obligation

Originally published by Sean Patrick on 19th June 2015.

Image : citroenet.org
Image : citroenet.org

It’s near midnight early in 1955 in a nondescript French suburb. The scene is an office, deserted except for one man at a drawing board. There is a sudden flash of green light.
Continue reading “Theme Of Themes : Evolution – When Genes Mutate”

Fiat Multipla: Time to Belt Up

Richard’s recent examination of a brochure for a 1998 Fiat Multipla inevitably drew diverging opinions in the comments about the vehicle’s styling.

The contentious belt line.
The Multipla’s contentious belt line.

My own position has always been that, with their first attempt, Fiat’s chefs mixed together too many challenging ingredients to make the resultant dish palatable. The facelift, on the other hand, skewed too far the other way, removing much of the flavour by imposing a bland face on an otherwise interesting body. Continue reading “Fiat Multipla: Time to Belt Up”

C what I did

Further to Sean Patrick´s excellent idea about decals to give your boring car a more contemporary, fun and sporting look, I have shown three products in the upcoming range.

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The decals make the car more premium, add a touch of dynamic flair and increase the perceived quality by accentuating the maturity of the style. Graphics and sculpting together produce a greater sense of athleticism while underlining the greater modernity of the cars.

Theme : Film – DTW Recommends

DTW recommends some of its favourite films.

poster

BORDERLESS LIMITS : When feisty Australian ex-lifeguard Lindi Jackson (Nicole Kidman), on holiday in Europe after her marriage break-up, gets mistaken for a British businesswoman and offered the top job at French car maker Citroën, it looks like a recipe for mayhem. However Lindi vows that she will make a success of the ailing firm by introducing the element most missing from today’s cars …. FUN! But it’s never going to be plain sailing. As if the stuffed shirts in the boardroom and the constant harassment from a weird bunch calling themselves Citroënistes isn’t enough, Lindi is visited by the ghost of André Citroën (a tour de force characterisation by Johnny Depp). After a hilarious bunch of wacky misunderstandings, Lindi and André form an uneasy alliance, but will they be able to put the joie back into the chevrons? DTW VIEW : Absolutely Chucklesome! Great Fun! Continue reading “Theme : Film – DTW Recommends”

Opening Up the TR7 Envelope

Spot a Triumph TR7 in a car park and you may well experience something rather strange. 

triumphtr7-01

Unenlightened passers-by won’t give it a second look, whereas examples of most of its boxy contemporaries would attract their immediate attention. The last of the TRs shares with its Rover SD1 stablemate an ability to blend into the 21st century carscape, despite originating over forty years ago. Continue reading “Opening Up the TR7 Envelope”

DTW Summer Reissue : Len & Now

Recent talk of 5 cylinders causes our Editor to conflate two of his pieces from DTW’s very early days

Len Brik Cover

Many thanks to Eoin for his kind mention below of my recent little volume on Sir Basil Milford-Vestibule. I’ve been putting away the research material of late and was leafing through the long out-of-print autobiography of Len Brik, who will be remembered by many of us longer serving types as the charismatic Chief Engineer at Victory Cars.  Following the merger of Victory Cars with Empire, he came into close rivalry with Sir Basil. Len was entirely self taught and there was mutual loathing between the two men. Sir Basil is usually reported as referring to Brik as ‘The Blacksmith’, though more exactly he used the phrase ‘The Blacksmith’s Dull Apprentice’, whilst Brik returned the compliment with ‘Sir Beryl’. Continue reading “DTW Summer Reissue : Len & Now”

Requiem for a 5-Series

As BMW readies a new 5 GT for 2017, we pay tribute to their 2009 niche-bender by recounting the dolorous tale of one such car.

Image: Zombdrive
Image: Zombdrive

Back in 2009, BMW introduced the 5-Series GT – a car few have felt much affection for, the poor thing. It’s unclear why BMW felt they needed it. When it first appeared as the Progressive Activity Sedan concept in 2007, it seemed BMW were just toying with niches in a similar manner to their Swabian rivals in Stuttgart-Untertürkheim. But PAS was no R-Class, being far more saloon-like in concept and appearance, even if the desirability of a 5-door BMW hatchback as large as a 7-Series seemed questionable even in those innocent pre-crash days. Continue reading “Requiem for a 5-Series”

Sir Basil Milford-Vestibule. An Interview

In a recently unearthed transcription, Simon A. Kearne matches wits with engineering legend, Sir Basil Milford-Vestible. 

Image: fab50s
Image: fab50s

It has been long assumed that Sir Basil Milford-Vestible never gave interviews, but a moth-eaten copy of The Journal of Automotive Progress – Spring 1959 number recently came to light in Simon’s attic. In a World exclusive, the mercurial engineering genius gossips about rivals, takes issue with aero and heaps vitriol on the double chevron.

Continue reading “Sir Basil Milford-Vestibule. An Interview”

Throttlegod Decides – Pagani Huayra BC

Simon welcomes a new guest author to the Driven to Write ranks. Feathers have been ruffled.

Throttlegod Circuit Marcel Duchamp 2

EDITOR’S NOTE : My Founders have recently asked me to investigate the possibility of securing some advertising revenue. All the feelers I have put out suggest that we first need to attract a wider readership to this site. In particular it was pointed out that re-publishing fifty year old road tests or impressions of small modern hatchbacks hired from airports does not attract the more hard-core enthusiast. With this in view, I have commissioned a leading journalist from the performance car press to pen a piece for us. Though usually published under another name, here he has chosen the nom-de-plume of Throttlegod. In an attempt to attract this new readership, I am fearlessly breaking the manufacturer’s embargo by publishing his recent test in advance of the car’s debut by way of a scoop. Continue reading “Throttlegod Decides – Pagani Huayra BC”

Theme : Special – An Early Bath

As a fiftieth sporting anniversary fast approaches, we combine this month’s theme with our Print The Legend series and look at what could have been one of the first-ever Special Editions.

image : www.morrisclub.nl
image : http://www.morrisclub.nl

Following England’s victory in the 1966 World Cup, jingoistic feelings were high. BMC wanted to commemorate the event and hastily planned a tribute in time for the Earls Court Motor Show. An intimate committee to consider the alternatives was formed, consisting of BMC’s head of marketing and an outside consultant, the journalist Archie Vicar. Their first idea, to have a series of 11 limited editions, all Morrises, named after each player in the final was deemed impractical, so a single iconic image was chosen, that of the number 4 shirt, Nobby Stiles, dancing a jig after the match and grinning through his missing front teeth. Continue reading “Theme : Special – An Early Bath”

Theme : Economy – The Open Road

London, September 2025 : A Modern Motorist Writes

image from skyscrapercity.com

It’s now 10 years since the revelations regarding the erstwhile car producer, Volkswagen, came to light. Initially, industry experts predicted that it would be a large storm, but one that would soon subside. In the thinking of a previous decade, VW was seen as ‘too big to fail’ and it was assumed that, suitably chastised, the motor industry would soon revert to its established ways. Continue reading “Theme : Economy – The Open Road”

Theme : Evolution – When Genes Mutate

We go back to a time before fun was a 24/7 obligation

Image : citroenet.org
Image : citroenet.org

It’s near midnight early in 1955 in a nondescript French suburb. The scene is an office, deserted except for one man at a drawing board. There is a sudden flash of green light.
Continue reading “Theme : Evolution – When Genes Mutate”

Theme: Evolution – Coming Soon…

Next year’s E-Class will be a tech-fest. We lift the lid.

The S-Class' younger, smarter and slightly cheaper brother. Still want that top of the range Merc? Image via Autocar
The S-Class’ younger, smarter and slightly cheaper brother. Still want that top range Benz? Image Autocar

Next year’s Mercedes E-Class is primed to evolve ‘in-car connectivity’ and autonomous driving to the next level, says a report in Automotive News Europe this week. Thomas Weber, Daimler’s head of development, told ANE journalists; “Innovations in this area are coming thick and fast,”. Just how thick and how fast Sindelfingen’s 2016 mid-liner will be, DTW can now exclusively reveal. Continue reading “Theme: Evolution – Coming Soon…”

Theme: Evolution – What Citroen Did Next

While we’re on this Citroen kick, I wondered idly about an alternative evolutionary pathway from where the XM left off. What could Citroen have done next?

2016 Citroen Grande Berline
Citroen Grande Berline. Image: Richard Herriott

Here is the Citroen C8 of the year 2000. In order to avoid giving critics ammunition, PSA invested in a new platform for the C8 which was adaptable such that a large Peugeot saloon and a corporate monospace were also spun off it at a later date. The main details were that it involved extensive use of lightweight steel and aluminium for the doors, bonnet and liftgate. The goal was to make a car slightly larger than the XM but weighing 10% less. Continue reading “Theme: Evolution – What Citroen Did Next”

Bridget Gorfe’s Diary

In the spirit of even-handedness, we feel we should present selected extracts of this disturbing counterview to the recent pieces we have published by Myles Gorfe.

Micra

SUNDAY 14 DECEMBER 2014 (12.45am) : Sunday lunch is in the oven and Myles has just come in from working on the Granada. The poor love looked so miserable. He spent all morning fitting a new part he bought on Ebay and it doesn’t work. He’s just popped up to his man-cave to order another.

SUNDAY 14 DECEMBER 2014 (3.45pm) : Oh well, that was Sunday lunch. The kids liked it anyway but Myles was a no-show. I’ve kept his warm. He’d promised to have a look at my Micra today but it looks like that won’t happen. Continue reading “Bridget Gorfe’s Diary”

Alternative Paths In An Unpredictable Industry

DTW Considers The Alternative German Big Three


At the end of the 1950s, there was a sizeable group of home-owned players in the German industry, but we shall concentrate initially on three of them – Borgward, NSU and Glas. Only the first few paragraphs of this piece are fact, the rest is entirely speculation as to how things could have worked out quite differently, yet might have ended up much the same.

Borgward had been making cars since the 1920s. They were fast to restart manufacture after the War, being the first German company to put an all new car into production, the Hansa 1500. This was replaced in 1954 by the mid-sized Isabella and that was joined in 1959 by both the larger six-cylinder P100 and the smaller Arabella, featuring a flat 4 boxer that Subaru used as a reference point when developing their own engine. Continue reading “Alternative Paths In An Unpredictable Industry”

Jeremy Clarkson Joins Driven To Write

The Outgoing Editor Writes

No Hard Feelings : Simon hands over to The Big Man at a hostelry close to the DTW offices.
No Hard Feelings : Simon hands over to The Big Man at a hostelry close to the DTW offices.

It is with a mixture of sorrow and goodwill that I announce my departure as Senior Editor of Driven To Write, and my immediate replacement by the well-known motoring personality, Mr Jeremy Clarkson. On discussing this with me, The Founders stressed that this has been a hugely painful decision for them to make. I have worked tirelessly over the past 18 months, building this site to be the informed and thoughtful forum it is today. However, there is competition out there and The Founders felt that their ambitions to reach the widest readership possible were not being totally realised. With Mr Clarkson on board they see the chance to leap, at a stroke, from the current readership, who I believe are mostly aged relatives of the three, to one of several billion.

Continue reading “Jeremy Clarkson Joins Driven To Write”

Good To Go?

Following our recent discussions on both Advertising and the Borgward revival, DTW have received an unsubstantiated transcript of a meeting between Borgward’s Head of Marketing and the Creative Director of their London-based Advertising Agency.

Storyboard B

Dieter, Dieter, Mein Herr Geezer. How goes it?

Good morning Miller. Very good to see you. Everything is fine at our end. We’re gearing up for Geneva – very confident, though a bit nervous at the same time, naturally. It is all a big step. But we must discuss the film. I showed your rough edit to the board yesterday.

So they loved it, right?

Not exactly Miller. They did not feel that it projected Borgward values.

And what are they Dieter?

As we told you before. As they always were, so will they be. Solid. Dependable. Discreet. Middle Class.

So what’s the problem? That describes the guy driving the car in the ad perfectly. It took ages to find him you know. What don’t they like? Continue reading “Good To Go?”

Theme : Concepts – Yet Another DS Stunner!

Steaming Hot News From Paris!

DSuperficiale

Following on the heels of the Divine, the Paris Salon was today stunned by another offering from PSA’s ambitious DS brand, its latest concept the DSupérficiâle. Originally thought by diehard enthusiasts to be a homage to the D Super, itself the successor to the classic ‘no-frills’ ID19, PSA was anxious to dispel such misconceptions. At the press launch, DS spokesman Jean Conneries, standing in front of a still-shrouded shape, explained the philosophy behind the car.

We are foremost a French brand. We must build on that as the 21st Century progresses. However, in the past we have mistakenly concentrated too much on those aspects of heritage that are specifically Citroën. France has a huge heritage that it has bequeathed the World and foremost in that is philosophy. The philosophy of this car is ….. philosophy itself! Continue reading “Theme : Concepts – Yet Another DS Stunner!”

Showtime Showdown – Olympia 1957

In this extract from Simon A. Kearne’s excellent biography of Sir Basil Milford-Vestibule, he details the only recorded meeting between the legendary engineer and bitter rival, Len Brik at the London’s 1957 Olympia Motor Show. 

1959poster

Simon A. Kearne writes: Sir Basil never missed an opportunity to attend the annual London Motor Show, although he habitually detested everything he saw there. He would sweep around the show stands, the ever-present Montclair in hand, accompanied by his faithful assistant, Boothby, unintentionally insulting friend and foe alike. On this occasion, I accompanied them during press day and as we arrived at the Lotus stand, Colin Chapman hurriedly ducked behind some packing crates in a vain attempt to avoid our party.

Continue reading “Showtime Showdown – Olympia 1957”

Luca’s Woolly Nemesis

The sudden departure of Luca di Montezemolo as Ferrari MD has shocked tifosi and surprised analysts. But one key question remains unanswered – what happened? 

marchionne-montezemolo-640

Ever the truth-seekers, Drive to Write appear to have accidentally stumbled upon the answer, gleaned from (admittedly dubious) sources close to FCA itself, revealing the unspoken reason for his departure – the mysterious disappearance of Sergio’s favourite jumper – (A particularly fine blue angora number). Continue reading “Luca’s Woolly Nemesis”

Len & Now 2

A Legend Remembered – Again

The 1957 Victory Diva

A few months ago, I published a snippet from the autobiography of that legend of the British Motor Industry, the Chief Engineer of Victory Cars, Len Brik. Since then I have had a request for a further extract, but I must admit that a small amount of the late Len Brik’s odd grammar goes a long way. However, I can offer you some alternative Brik related information. Continue reading “Len & Now 2”

1986 Volvo 360 GLT Review

Pantomime Horses : Just how good is the 1986 Volvo 360 GLT?

1986 Volvo 360 GLT

by Roderick Darndon-Dramb. Photography by Bart Chappel. From “Autocarriage & Performance Drivercar”  (March 1986).

The advertising says this is the Volvo that thinks it´s a Porsche. Clearly Volvo wants us to see this car as the driver´s choice. The people at Volvo have lost their minds. The 360’s aerodynamics remain submerged below the bottom of the league. The exterior is reminiscent of the Seagram Building rather than an F-40 jet. This is not a Porker.

Continue reading “1986 Volvo 360 GLT Review”

Theme : Cute Car Hall of Fame – FAB 1

Simon reveals his softer side.

Fab 1 Crop

I’ve asked myself if I can think of a large car that is ‘cute’ and, at present, can only think of one, but perhaps that is because this particular vehicle will always have a dominant place in my memories. In the late Seventies, I filled in for the European Motoring Correspondent on Soldier Of Fortune magazine when he was unavoidably detained for several months by the German security services. Apart from it being the introduction to my beloved Alvis Stalwart, when I tested one for the ‘Used and Bruised’ feature, that time also has more tender memories for me.

Continue reading “Theme : Cute Car Hall of Fame – FAB 1”

Theme : Cute – Name That Mitsubishi

To celebrate Cute Month at DTW, we are offering Mitsubishi, FREE OF CHARGE, the attached name restructuring for their UK vehicle range.  

Mitsubishi copy

Our consultants have come up with names that celebrate the ever maximising lifestyles of  the 21st Century motorist whilst silently vocalising the informal outlook filtered through the standpoint of pertinent social media. Prices have been raised accordingly to reflect the added desirability these cute but cutting-edge names will surely engender.

 

Theme : Cute – Farewell, My Cutie

“My Velma. She’s cute as lace pants”.

Figaro 02

Cute. I’d been hearing it a lot that day. Moose Molloy’s gaze shifted towards the window and his expression changed slowly. It was like watching a landscape erode but, after that eternity had passed, there was a big lake of a smile rippling across his face and, somehow, I knew I was going to hear that C word again.

“Hey Marlowe, is that cute pink Figaro outside yours?”

A guy like Moose was big enough not to need to humiliate you with your choice of wheels, but I thought it best to offer him some clarification.

Continue reading “Theme : Cute – Farewell, My Cutie”

Internal Correspondence 2

If all goes well I´ll be inviting Piech and Marchionne to an evening dinner to take them through the main features of the blog. Can you get someone to re-write that item about Marchionne so it´s less abrasive?

Image

Dear Simon:

Just a quick note. I am planning to attend the Geneva show. As usual I will be staying at the Hotel De Bergues (below). Daily rates are a reasonable Continue reading “Internal Correspondence 2”

Internal Correspondence 1

Dear Simon:

Please find attached the invoice for my recent posts, as discussed.

The restaurant bill will be sent as a hard copy by post. My sources provided a lot of valuable information on the topics and, in my view, the trip to Milan was entirely unavoidable. As you will readily agree, that my source was three days late entirely explains the duration of my stay at the Principe de Savoia. I´d recommend it for our next team-building workshop.

Vis à vis the other team members, I trust you´ll keep my remarks private.

Best,

R

Richard. There seems a bit of a glitch here. Your bloody note to me has come up on our front page. I emphasised that your trip was strictly ‘Black Ops’ didn’t I? Please exercise more discretion in future. I can’t work out how to delete this post but, as soon as that IT Chappy comes in next week, I’ll take it down. If anyone else is reading this, please don’t! Simon

Len & Now

Many thanks to Eoin for his kind mention below of my recent little volume on Sir Basil Milford-Vestibule. 

Len Brik Cover

I’ve been putting away the research material of late and was leafing through the long out-of-print autobiography of Len Brik, who will be remembered by many of us longer serving types as the charismatic Chief Engineer at Victory Cars.  Following the merger of Victory Cars with Empire, he came into close rivalry with Sir Basil. Len was entirely self taught and there was mutual loathing between the two men.  Sir Basil is usually reported as referring to Brik as ‘The Blacksmith’, though more exactly he used the phrase ‘The Blacksmith’s Dull Apprentice’, whilst Brik returned the compliment with ‘Sir Beryl’. Continue reading “Len & Now”

Sir Basil Milford-Vestibule – a Life Unstitched

KnittingPatternSimon A Kearne’s biography of Sir Basil Milford-Vestibule has been long awaited and well overdue. Keenly awaited by enthusiasts of both engineering and knitting alike, this comprehensive overview of an almost-legendary engineering genius and his lifetime’s work as chief engineer of The Empire Motor Company. K earne, (who requires little introduction round these parts), was granted unprecedented access to the Milford-Vestibule archive and through painstaking research, has crafted a biography as maddeningly eccentric as the subject himself; a book, one can’t help feeling, Sir Basil would have berated publicly but secretly adored.  Continue reading “Sir Basil Milford-Vestibule – a Life Unstitched”